Why do people take sides

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Published: 16th October 2012
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Usually, when two friends are upset with one another; their mutual friends will take sides on who should be apologizing or who is at fault. The problem is not who is at fault or who is not; it's why do people interfere in matters that should not concern them. Sometimes the interference from outer parties will not only not solve anything, but will enlarge the whole issue and affect it negatively.
It is not uncommon for people to interfere; the reason might be curiosity or good will. But goodwill will not always solve troubles but sometimes it will actually add more issues to be solved unknowingly.
A problem between two people only takes two people to solve and if help was required then the ones involved in the issue should be the one asking for it. If someone from outside thinks that he has a solution for the problem, he should first ask whether the people involved need it or not; if so, then they may suggest it.
But this isn't a rule. Situations differ and participants of an issue differ in personality. The rules of privacy should not apply on every issue, for some issues even require the counseling and therapy.

The reason why might interfere in your problems is can be explained in a number of ways. If it was a family member, then it might be out of the sense of responsibility that they have towards you; no matter how old you are or how far they are from you. By talking to someone about your problems, you somehow provoke them to feel responsible towards you.
People will think that the reason you are talking to them about a specific issue is out of the need of help. You might get annoyed if they try anything on their own to resolve the issue, but always remember that if they want to help, then it's always out of goodwill; even if they wanted something in return.

People might also come to a conclusion that someone might need their help if a problem remains to reoccur; but even though their purpose might be good, sometimes the issue will be looked at from one prospective or one point of view where they will take the side of the seemingly right person against the one that is more intimidating.
Short sight and little knowledge of problems will change the side people take, but people are not supposed to take sides until they reach the full idea of the issue and how it's handled; however, based on the events they have seen, people may become extremely judgmental.
There is no way to stop people from taking sides in an argument; it's in our genes to take a side whether it's competition or not unless we are indifferent about the whole subject then we might just offer an opinion, wait and watch until the whole issue is resolved.

If people did not take sides then even annoying problems will be most boring and sometimes it's the interference that will help things get done. The fact that people take sides should not change the fact that a problem will need a solution and if it was against you, then they just might see something that is out of your own sight. Do not judge people on the decisions they take or else you will be the one judged, but always observe and listen, offer an opinion and ask before jumping into any unhealthy inconsiderate conclusions.


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